Emotional Intelligence: How to Become a People Person at a Bar

Estimated read time: <5  minutes 

I get attached to places, things, and people—all way too soon. This friendly neighbourhood pub down the road has an amazing feel to it, and I’ve been there way too many times to not become a regular customer. This one time, I took my charming, talkative friend to that same brewery and it just took him some 20 minutes to have the staff smiling ear to ear—serving him with utmost pleasure. I won’t lie, I was proud but also a little jealous. “How did you manage to do that just one single time you’ve been?”– I asked him. While he chuckled, I went on to rant: “They haven’t been so happy about me, even though I’m pretty much the reason behind half their revenue and footfall!”

There’s no better getaway than a chill bar where you unwind whenever you want, especially with the crew on board with you—favouring you, greeting you with warmth, friendly with you, and glad to host you. Now, the tips and tricks my alluring friend gave me on becoming a favourite at your regular bar, go somewhat on these lines:

  1. Don’t be cheap.

Please, save your saving-spree for transactions that require less personal interaction: online shopping, slot machines, last-second holiday gifts for your in-laws. But if you want to be part of a bar’s club of regulars, you got to pay your dues, and go a little out of the way—so that they do. Who’s more deserving than the poor schmucks labouring on their feet to serve you one glass after the next of liquid escape? Tip them.

  1. Never get too wasted.

They hate sloppy drunkards who create a ruckus at their place, brawl, need to be carried to the cab, and make them work extra. Have some respect, man. Leave with your head held high and speech un-slurred. The weary bartenders’ hero, you can do this by pretending to down shots for giving company to the new pal you made, when there’s really just water in the glass.

  1. Be a hero.

If you truly see unwieldy customers acting outside of the business’s implied code of conduct, be a decent advocate for your second home. When the owner or manager hears of your valour, they will forever be grateful—especially that you didn’t get kicked and sue them for liability.

  1. Don’t seem desperate.

Courting the favour of your preferred bar’s populace is almost like wooing a romantic conquest. Be cool, keep to yourself without seeming entirely dismissive, and appear occupied with more than just endless pints of beer. Bring a newspaper or crossword book with you and welcome polite conversation when it comes. Regulars will eventually open their ranks, and your kindly servers will have figured you to not be a weirdo, be trustworthy and let down their guard.


Image Credit: The New Filmore
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